Waffles, Bryce Petty, and the Meaning of Life

Darren Carroll

The Legend of Midnight Waffles

Waffle irons are ingenious devices with a rich history and a variety of uses. In the recent past, waffle irons have been responsible for the rise of Nike, the spike in American obesity rates, a means of making waffles, and happiness. In the distant past, waffle irons have been used as torture devices, a means of making waffles, and as devices used to literally burn one's family crest into food. That's effing metal, yo. Iron pun intended, kind of.

Anyways, I've had an affinity for breakfast food since I was a wee lad. While almost all breakfast foods (see: pancakes, scrambled eggs, donuts, bacon) are divine, waffles are on a different plane of existence. Waffles transcend normal breakfast foods. In keeping with this idea, I decided that in order for one to maximize the potential awesomeness of their day, the first thing they should do is eat a waffle. Thus, the idea of the Midnight Waffle was born.

The Mission

If you follow me on Twitter, you know about Midnight Waffles. I've been making waffles at midnight for a while now. Before I got to Baylor, I'd make them for myself the night before a big test, or make them for friends or girls I wanted to impress. Now I see them as a tool for social change and improving campus morale. Sunday evening, I put on the first Midnight Waffles of the 2014 spring semester. Over 25 people showed up and chowed down on delicious, butter infused waffles, the recipe for which was provided by our own Peter Pope. The reviews were through the roof, and I decided that Midnight Waffles would become a weekly tradition to be held on Friday nights/Saturday mornings. Then I got an idea.

Bryce Petty is a big man. Big men like food. Based on the evidence above, Bryce Petty likes waffles, but whoever normally makes waffles for him just isn't up to snuff. Bryce Petty needs Midnight Waffles more than any of us if he plans on leading Baylor to a national championship next season.

That's when a friend of mine tweeted this:

Yes, the man himself favorited that. It's certainly unlikely, but this Friday night Bryce Petty may show up to Midnight Waffles and we're going to be ready for him if he does. "The Bryce Petty" is a standard waffle infused with fresh blueberries, cooked to golden perfection to match the color of the throwback helmet he wore in the Texas game. On top is a lathering of whipped cream and more fresh blueberries arranged in a "14". All of this is dusted with powdered sugar, and syrup will be kept on hand.

The Possibilities

If Bryce Petty knows about Midnight Waffles, there's no way to go but up. As more and more Baylor celebrities attend, they will have waffles named after them as well. This post is an open forum for potential recipes. Have at it, and you may eventually have a picture hanging in your kitchen of [insert widley-known Baylor personality here] gobbling up a waffle you designed. Some of the best from the Twitterverse are below. The best suggestion will have a Midnight Waffle named after them.

Fanposts on ODB are user-submitted and do not necessarily reflect the opinions/views of, SB, or any of the writers, editors, or contributors here.

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