Hello and welcome to what will become your weekly source of a Monday pick-me-up. Unless of course you are a Tech fan stuck in Lubbock, because ... well I don't even have to explain. Why am I so bold in saying that this "will" be your weekly source of a Monday pick-me-up? Uhhh, can God save a hooker?
Typically I will provide you with reactions to various plays and highlights of the Baylor games on Saturdays (or whenever they may be) in GIFs, however, we take things seriously here at ODB and because we take things seriously we know that you are so hungry for football news I could make a clip of Emma Stone on Ellen appear relevant to a blog about Baylor Sports.
To begin, perhaps it's not too becoming for me to talk a little trash to start the season, however, I think our friends in Norman love it when we talk about their secondary so maybe I should. Of course, I told this joke to Mack Brown and he simply couldn't understand why the Sooner's secondary weren't playing quarterback.
In truth, now that we have built up more intrigue around Baylor Football than has ever existed - I find it quite alright if I have a little fun with our fellow Big 12 cohorts. I would have started with the easiest to pick on, but their Coach already took care of that for me. So instead I took on Tech, Oklahoma and Texas - except unlike Iowa State, I didn't lose. Yeah I see you laughing over there, WVU, that was hilarious right? Just like your first season in the Big 12?
Anyway, as all of TCU goes to work defending the color red, when Gary Patterson was asked about the uniforms he responded in song. I shared the tune with Bill Snyder and he muttered something to the effect of "kids these days and their acoustic guitars. What is the world coming to?" I then reminded Mr. Snyder that it was 2013 - acoustic guitars should be no surprise - and he remarked that he hasn't been able to keep anything straight since a 52-24 shellacking in Waco, TX on November 17, 2012. I would make a joke about the city of Stillwater and move on to the GIFs, but they still seem to be preoccupied with catching Lache Seastrunk and his pulled hamstring so we'll go ahead and move on ...
When someone says "I just don't know if the Bears can go to four straight bowl games."
Trying to keep up with all of the blog posts, articles, radio and TV shows this week about the Bears.
Waking up on Saturday
Any Baylor fan when asked how Art Briles does it.
Bryce Petty taking out the OU secondary.
Your friend from College Station says that Johnny Manziel's 2012 season was better than RG3's 2011 season.
What you imagine when trying to pronounce Wofford.
Wofford defenders chasing Lache Seastrunk on Saturday.
Your boss/professor catches you on OurDailyBears.com
When that article predicted a Baylor vs. Alabama National Championship.
You hear a conversation about Baylor Football from across the room.
When you see anything associated with Texas A&M
Every freshman on campus Friday night before going to bed in anticipation of Saturday.
The thought of having the defense play like they did against Kansas State and UCLA ALL SEASON LONG.
When you heard Glasco Martin is well enough to play again
When someone claims to have a better offense.
Your friend says "I forgot football was back."
Trying to get to Saturday.
Finally, that GIF of Emma Stone that I told you would be relevant: How Baylor Nation feels about this post.
And remember fans, no need to get all upset over a little dishing. That would be like clocking your times by hand and as we all know, hand times are for your mama. Your mama don't work here.